Just a quick vent...

I have already mentioned this a little in another post, but just have different thoughts to add.

A couple of times when I shared my recent struggles with my mom people would kind of grin/smile and say to me, "Oh, sounds like having kids", or " Oh, now you know what those of us who have kids feel like", or " Now you know what it's like to have kids". This hurt me each time I heard it, because no, I sadly don't have a clue what it's like to have children, but I just don't feel it's at all the same. I would try to explain to them that I don't feel it is the same because for one thing I can't discipline my mom. I feel bad that I have let it bother me so much, but it just hurts because it almost feels as though they are trying to diminish what I am feeling and going through by making it seem that they sort of understand. I know they don't by any means mean to sound like that. But this is something that unless you are right in it, it will be hard to understand. One of the most difficult things for a child is to see your parents age and then to try to take over that place. I'm not supposed to tell my mom what to do, she's my mom, not my child. I don't think people understand how hard that can be. Each morning I get up and take Bella out and I have to try to remember each time to tell mom to get out of bed and go to the bathroom. Sometimes she says ok and does, other times she says, "Yes, mother". Then once in a while she will say she doesn't need to get up now, she doesn't need to go or she already got up and went. If this was a child you would discipline them for the times that they did not obey right away, especially if the bed ended up being wet. I can't do that with my mom. Then there are times when the bed is wet, sometimes on those days, mom will just say that it's time for her to go to a nursing home. This is hard to hear, and kids aren't going to talk like that. Yes, I do get the fact that kids do wet the bed and the thought that what I am going through is like having kids seems like it would fit here, but for a child you know they will eventually get it down and get better. That won't happen in my mom's case. It's also been frustrating because mom loves to feed Bella, not dog food, but whatever mom is eating. She will give her 5 or more french fries, or let her lick her plate, or put some of her food in Bella's bowl. I worry that she won't be careful about what she gives and will end up giving Bella something that could make her really sick or kill her. Bella is also gaining too much weight and I'm afraid that is going to kill her too. I try to tell my mom this, but she just ignores me. She's not a child so what do I do? Plus she is at home with her all day by herself, how can I keep her from doing that? A parent even though they often feel stuck can get away for a night and have someone babysit. I can go out, and I don't have to or don't even have someone to sit for her. So when I'm out I feel guilty for leaving her at home by herself for so long. Then I also worry about whether or not she is ok. I try to get home to make sure she is ok, Bella is ok, and before she has to take Bella out at night. I don't like her being outside by herself. When I ask her not to go downstairs or not to take a shower when I'm not here, she doesn't understand why she can't do the things she has always done. These are just some of the many things I have been thinking about wanting to vent to show that no indeed, taking care of an ailing, mentally struggling parent, is not quite the same as having kids. There are many similarities, but also many difficult differences. I guess I would just like someone to understand that.
Lord, forgive me for having a wrong spirit when people may not understand or know the right things to say. Keep me humble and kind. Help me not to allow something that someone said maybe without thinking about it fully to bother me so much. Let me bring it to you and leave it there. Thank you for understanding and always being there for me when I need you. Thank you for caring and taking care of me through these struggles! Please help me to keep looking up!