Thursday, December 22, 2011

Happy Birthday!

No, it's not my birthday! It's not mom's birthday either...a little too early for that. Not pappy's birthday either, just a tad too early for his. So that only leaves one special birthday girl...that would be.........Bella!! Yes, Bella is 7 today! 3 years and 3 days ago we were blessed with her in our home, and just 3 days later we are celebrating her 7 years of life. She definitely got spoiled today...as if that's much different from any other day. Well, today mom and I took Bella to Evergreen Walk. We had to take a trip to one of our favorite places Leaps and Bones. That's where we get Bella's birthday cake. We walked around a bit more before mom was ready to get in the car. Bella wasn't quite ready, though. Once mom got situated in the car, Bella and I did some more exploring. An older lady saw her and thought she was so cute and petted her a little, and it seemed after that Bella kept looking at people as they walked by to see if they might want to indulge in a little petting session as well. The funny thing is that whenever people come to the house she tries so hard to get their attention to pet her and hold her. She would be content to just sit in their lap the rest of the day. Yet when she is out, she's so busy that she can only give people a few seconds of her time. But she really seemed to be looking for the next person who would be enamored by her cuteness to want to pet her. She would walk by people and look up at them or sniff at their feet. She did get a couple of others to acknowledge her. We went into my other favorite new store that I wrote about before, Ten Thousand Villages. A little 3 year old boy came in and Bella just wanted to go see him. She was finally able to and she did well, although she once again could only spare a few seconds of her precious exploration time. We did have a nice little chat with this adorable boy and his parents. We finally got back to mom in the car and headed home. My mom's brother came over a little after we got home and Bella got her wish, to sit on his lap the whole time he was here. Then tonight Bella indulged in a little bit of her cake, while mom and I shared a little ice cream and a cupcake with her.
And after we were done oddly enough, mom ended up indulging a little more, but not with ice cream and there were no more cupcakes left...do you see where I am heading with this?? Why yes, she indulged in a small piece of Bella's cake. She liked it seeds and all...oh my. Now my sweet little girl is snuggled up right next to me on the recliner, love these moments. Happy Birthday little girl!
Lord, thank you again for Bella. She's such a wonderful, sweet, naughty, spoiled, fun, crazy, bad, terrific, wild, enjoyable blessing for us! Please allow us many more years to enjoy and spend with her.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

3 Years Ago Yesterday

It seems hard to believe that it has been three years since I was able to have the Christmas gift that I had been wanting, and waiting for for over 20 years. Three years ago yesterday Bella came into our lives. Seeing as neither one of my parents ever wanted a dog in the house, this was a definite miracle! It was amazing how things came together. I had hoped and prayed that after pappy died that we could possibly get a dog for the house. I knew it would be a great addition to the house. It would give mom a purpose again, and since it was just the two of us now, I would feel safer having a dog around, plus I've just always really wanted one! I love dogs! A wonderful friend from church, Maria, not only talked to me about what I had been thinking and praying about, she also gave me a couple of great books where I could see some of the pros and cons of the different breeds to see which would be the best fit for us. I learned so much, and had narrowed it down to a few different breeds. I knew it could not be a big dog, mom would never be able to handle that. I don't think mom could handle it if it was a puppy either. I knew that would be hard for both of us. It couldn't be too energetic, needed to be a good companion, a lap dog, also thought it would be good for it to have hair...that way mom couldn't claim (as she had tried to do before) that she was allergic. I had been looking on Petfinder, I had gone to the Humane Society a couple of times. (As a side note: the very first time I went to the Humane Society was about a week after my pappy had passed away. I was home with mom and we had just been doing some different things that day. I thought it would be clever to go look at the different animals, but especially the dogs of course, to see if she would soften to the idea of getting one. As we drove into the parking lot, mom saw the name Humane Society and started getting nervous. She asked if I was bringing her there to put her in there. Aww, I told her of course not, plus it wasn't for people, it was for animals. She said she didn't know, now that my pappy was gone, maybe I was going to put her someplace. Poor thing! Then wouldn't you know it, the only dogs that were there were pit mixes that were barking and jumping a lot! We didn't stay for long...so much for that idea!) I even went to the Puppy House, or something like that and we looked at a couple of dogs and you almost touched one, but I could tell I still wasn't really getting anywhere. Next thing I know, my friend, Maria, took good care of me again! She told me one Wednesday night that her boss was looking to give her dog away because she and her husband were not dog people, and the son who the dog belonged to was in college and was rarely home. The dog spent most of the day in a crate. Maria asked me if I wanted to pray about it, I told her that I had already been praying about it, so I just told her to tell her boss we would take the dog. I couldn't believe what I was saying! But this dog was a Maltese, that means she was small, she had hair (mom couldn't say she was allergic to her), she wasn't a puppy (she was 4), and the very best part.......she was FREE! This just seemed to be the answer to my prayers. I was excited, but didn't know how to tell mom what I had just done. So...I didn't tell her. I tried, believe me, it just never quite came up easily enough. So, here it was December 19, it was the half day left before Christmas break that year and it was also 11 months to the day after pappy died. I was so excited to hear that she was on her way to school, Maria's daughter, Lani, had her and brought her to me. I couldn't help but break down a little when I finally met her and had her in my arms.
My prayers had finally been answered. She came and hung out in the classroom with the kids, in her crate, while we finished our party. I finally brought her home...quite nervously I might add. I didn't know how mom would respond. When I got home she didn't believe me when I said she was ours, she thought I was maybe just dog-sitting for someone. Then the miracle happened! As I was showing mom the gifts from the kids, I put Bella on the bed near us, and not too long after, mom moved her hand and started petting her. I couldn't believe what I was seeing! I didn't even want to breathe so as not to break the spell. From that point on, our little Bella has been the biggest blessing to us! So thankful for the past 3 years with her and pray for many more years ahead.
Thank you, Lord, for working things out in a way that I never would have ever been able to imagine. You truly blessed us! You knew all along this special blessing you had for us, and you knew how much we would fall in love with her. Thank you for the right girl, in the right time, and in a way that you worked out so perfectly. Hmm...maybe I should remind myself of this when I stress or worry about some other things...I'll try.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

The Gang's All Here!

I had such a nice surprise this morning. Mom and I were told that the family was getting together at Hometown Buffet this morning. We have done that before, but there was really no reason that I knew of for this get-together. We got there and met my aunt and uncle that we spend a lot of time with, so mom was comfortable. As we were standing in the crazy long line, I heard something behind me. I turned to see my cousin Lou, she was yelling up to my uncle to say "Hey". She is so funny and loves to give my Uncle Cephus a hard time. That's where the surprise came in. She is from Georgia, but here she was in Connecticut! I looked around and saw more cousins and then my dad's sister....and....my dad's brother. I had no idea they were going to be up here. I was so glad to see them, I got quite emotional. I haven't seen them for a couple of years and didn't know when or even if I might ever see them again. What a blessing to see them! My Auntie Alberta is 87 and my Uncle George is 88. So, all of my dad's sisters and brothers that are still alive were all together again. That was so special. I had to get pictures. Life and time go by too quickly, I want to capture these special moments all the time now. My Auntie Alberta was also able to be with 3 of her kids that live up here. A little bit later some of the grand children and great grandchildren also came in. So there were probably 10 or so of them that came up from Georgia. I had no idea all of them were coming! I'm so glad I got to spend some time talking with Auntie Alberta. I asked her if she still lived in her house by herself and if Uncle George still lived on his own too. She said they both did still live alone. She said she still planted her garden during the summer, with bell peppers, hot peppers, sweet potatoes, tomatoes, and collard greens. She does it all herself. She said she still drives her car, goes to get groceries, and then cooks for Uncle George too. Uncle George's health has gone down, and he also struggles with demetia, but she and her daughters that live down there help take care of him. We had a nice section of the restaurant for the bit of the family that was there. There were quite a few that were unable to be there, but we still managed to have 3 rows of tables. I love my big, crazy, fun, amazing family. Dad's sister, Auntie Ann, with mom
Dad's sister, Auntie Alberta (87), talking with her sister-in-law, brother-in-law and sister, Ann

Dad's brothers, Uncle George (88), and Uncle John

Dad's brother, Uncle Henry with Uncle George
Cousin Lou with her granddaughter, Auntie Alberta's daughter and great granddaughter
Cousins!
Lord, thank you for this time with my family. Thank you for keeping them well so we could see them again. Thank you for allowing me to have such an amazing family. I miss my pappy at times like this, but it's special to be able to be around his brothers and sisters to bring some great memories. Thanks for new memories.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

It's Beginning to Look.....But Not Feel A Lot Like Christmas!

It's that time of year...my favorite time of year! Celebrating the birth of the Lord Jesus, singing wonderful Christmas carols, being cozy on cold winter nights with family and friends, decorating, watching great Christmas movies, listening to some of the most beautiful, and some of the most fun music, watching the snow gently fall to the ground. Well, I guess 5 out of 7 isn't bad, though for me it is a bit sad. We had our crazy snow storm at the end of October, but now have not seen any snow since then. For someone who lives for the stuff, it's been rough. Yes, feel bad for me! Also for someone who endures...barely...no really, barely...endures the hot summer days in anticipation of the cold this time of year brings, these 50 and 60+ degree temperatures are making those really cozy nights difficult. It does get down a little bit at night, but could be a little cooler. The kind of cold that makes you want to rush inside for a nice cup of hot chocolate. So even though I have seen people putting up their Christmas decorations and lights in shorts and T-shirts, which seems pretty pitiful, I have still already pulled out the trees and semi-decorated them. Though it may not FEEL like Christmas outside yet, it does look like Christmas (and has for a while) in many places, and now also in my house. I love driving around seeing the lights on houses and in yards, going to the mall to enjoy the decorations there, and hearing the music all around.
Here's a little glimpse of our trees, not sure how much more will be done, but love looking at pretty Christmas trees lighted up at night. Mom has definitely really been enjoying the one upstairs and thinks I am a master decorator, even though it is a pre-lit tree and all I basically did was drag it up from the basement and put it in the living room. I only added a few ornaments to it, hadn't even really finished it yet, but she's ready to call all the friends, family, neighbors... and decorating shows to tell them to come see the beauty I created, hee hee. She's pretty interesting/funny lately. She has told me a couple of times that she told my aunt, who lives in Virginia, that she needs to come see the tree...a fake tree...that was already pre-lit...has some gaping spots where it hasn't quite been fluffed out enough (or can't fluff out because it's so old)...has a few crazy bling ornaments on it...and leans awkwardly to the side, not thinking it would be worth all that trouble! But...as long as mom likes it, that works for me! I did find some fun blinged-out decorations for the trees, so that has been fun. Now if the weather would just cooperate, that would be swell! Love the color and bling factor of these ornaments from Michael's!


Love this bright pink feathery bird from Pier 1!
And how much fun is this butterfly?! Couldn't resist!

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Becoming Thankful

Thanksgiving??!?! I can't believe it's already that time of year again! The start of the holiday season. Am I really ready for this? Sadly, I haven't been as ready as I should be for this day. This has been quite a different fall, and Satan has been trying to discourage and bring me down. Trying to keep me from thankfulness.
This oddly enough reminds me of Storm Alfred from a few weeks ago. I couldn't help but continue to think as we drove around each day, that this was a SNOW storm. It looked and still looks as if it were a storm with strong straight line winds or a small tornado in some places. Who would think to really worry about their big trees because of snow...soft, fluffy, beautiful, white snow? But that soft, fluffy snow took down some pretty big, strong trees. These trees came down on cars, homes, and across roads causing so much damage. This makes me think of Satan, he showers us with lies, and continues to pile them on. It might start out with just a few simple lies, but if we are not careful, they slowly become more and stronger in our minds. These lies can really weigh us down, even those who are older or strong in the faith can become weighed down by his lies. He wants to break us down, to take our strength from us, and destroy us. Too often we start to believe those lies, and instead of being able to shake off those lies we let them start to affect us and break us down bit by bit. And if we're not careful we can fall, and fall hard, causing lots of damage.
The morning after the storm, the sun came out, and those branches and trees that hadn't broken, but were hanging so low were finally starting to stand back up straight again. If we can hold on and not allow those lies to break us, the Lord allows the sun to shine, to melt away those lies. I am so thankful for friends and family who have been that sun for me, encouraging me, praying for me, sharing with me, caring for me, shining strong to melt away the lies of Satan. Helping me shake them off, so I can stand back strong in the Lord.
Storm Alfred really helped me to start thinking more thankful thoughts than I had been for a while. When I thought of how God took care of our house, and allowed the only branches that came down to be way back in the yard. He allowed me to get gas when I needed, food for mom and I, and to keep my phone charged up. He allowed us to find Evergreen Walk to get us out of the house. He allowed us to have the money to get food throughout the week. He kept us safe in our house. As I thought of all this how could I not be thankful! Maybe if I had been praising Him more before, I wouldn't have gotten so weighed down with lies and discouragement. I am so thankful the Lord doesn't give up on us. I'm thankful for wonderful people He has put in my life to continually encourage me and help me to grow. I am thankful for my little family. I am thankful for my extended family. I am thankful for my house, and a car that at least still runs. I am thankful for great friends, old and new. I am thankful for the joy and laughter that children bring. I am thankful for the joy, laughter and good times that Bella brings to this house. For these and many, many other things, I am thankful. Though I miss dad so much around this time (really missed him today), I am so thankful for the many memories, and all of the wonderful years we had together. I am thankful for memories I still get to make with mom.
Thank you, Lord, for the Sun!

Saturday, November 19, 2011

And So It Ended...and Began

Yes, it had officially ended. No longer would there be the same quietness in the house. No longer would there be candlelit nights spent listening to talk radio. No longer would we just be hanging out together in the living room just talking and laughing. No longer would we so many different, wonderful smells from all the candles we had lit, or as a friend from church so eloquently put it..."the house smelling like Fruit Loops". No longer would there be the simple ease in each day. No longer would we wake up to a cold house, or experience going to sleep with blankets and comforters and sweatshirts and gloves. No longer would there be that opportunity to walk outside in the pitch black and see the amazing brilliance of so many more stars than we normally see. No longer would I take Bella out at night and enjoy the smell of fireplaces and wood burning stoves. No longer would there be that slight haze during the day because of so many stoves and fireplaces going at night. No longer would there be those casual trips to Evergreen Walk with mom and Bella almost every day...visiting different stores, meeting new people and dogs. No longer would we be eating a myriad of different foods from different places as we tried to keep ourselves fed. Yes, many things that I enjoyed and some things that I didn't necessarily care for, had ended. And then it began...
The alarm was now going off again. The getting ready and making sure to have everything for the day began again. Leaving mom and Bella home alone began again. The stress of life began again....making sure mom had her medicine in the morning, making sure Bella had water and food before I left, driving on the highway in traffic, running around to stores or appointments after school. Even mom, who had no problems during the power outage, woke up Monday morning and before I was getting ready to leave for school said she could not find her glasses. I quickly tried to look for them, but could not find them. At some point in the morning my mom said something, when I asked what she said, she just told me that she was talking to the TV. Oh my! Yes, it began again. When I got back from school she still hadn't found them. I looked more thoroughly around the house and finally found them under her bed. Yes, things were getting back to normal, some ways good, some ways...well, a little stressful. Thankfully I have great memories to go back to. So ends our journey through Storm Alfred. It may be over, but will never be forgotten.
Lord, it's funny how we think we can't live without certain things, but when it comes down to it and we have no choice we make it. Then, it's funny that when those things come back, we are sometimes ready to go back to simpler times. Thank you for those simpler times, but thank you for the blessing and ease of things that we are able to experience and enjoy today.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Same and Different

Two different days...woke up the same way, ate the same breakfast, but before we went to the same, wonderful place, the second day brought about something different, which I will talk about later. We went into some of the same stores we had visited during the week. But Bella chose a couple of different stores, too. One store, called Ten Thousand Villages, was very interesting. They had beautiful jewelry(I think Bella takes after her mommy), and other interesting and different items from all over the world. The girls that worked in the store loved Bella, they loved her little outfit and thought she was adorable. This was such a neat little store because people from villages around the world make every item in the store. As the items are sold, part of the proceeds go back to those people and their villages to help them out. I had never heard of this store before, but there are actually three of them in Connecticut. They also have a website www.tenthousandvillages.com. Each item has the place where the item was made on the price tag, so you have an idea of where the proceeds are going. Such a cool place! One of the girls said that this store is quite popular with dogs because they love the smells of the rawhide and grass-made gifts. Bella was really enjoying, but so was I. Nice find, Bella. Oh yea, and by the way, yes, I did buy a nice bracelet from this store, made in India. Bella also wanted to go into the Gap, where once again the workers commented on how cute she was. There was lady who came up to me in the store who didn't know dogs were allowed in the stores. I told her that not every store allowed dogs, but one of the reasons why I love Evergreen is because they have stickers on doors or windows of which stores allow dogs, and how they can be brought in. Some stores allow dogs to be on leash, while others would prefer only small dogs that can be held. This lady was excited to know that and said she would bring her small dog with her next time. The whole time I was talking to this lady, Bella was being so good. She also sashayed her little self into Talbot's (the girl has expensive taste), but after a little while I think even she realized this place might be a little much even for her. But once again, she was so well behaved. We both brought mom into Pottery Barn. I think we all enjoyed looking around in that store. As we were leaving a man with a tan much more orange (and I mean oompa loompa orange) than I have ever seen, with a plastic look to his face, commented on how cute Bella was in her outfit. Later we saw a small group that was strolling around with beautiful greyhounds, Bella was able to meet a couple of them. She wasn't quite as sure about some of them, but she didn't bark, just the smallest bit of a nervous growl escaped her. We also had three ladies come up to ask where we got Bella's outfit, one of them wanted to find something similar for her small dog. While one of the others questioned whether she was a bad owner because she didn't have a coat for her dog. Since her dog was bigger than Bella she never thought about getting it a coat. Then she noticed the greyhounds and many of them had coats on, too. So, now she was seriously wondering. We had a funny conversation and again Bella was a little lady. There was another lady while we were just walking around who went by and said that Bella was too cute to be believed...awww! But, the kicker was when we were walking and a little boy about 5 came up and asked if he could pet Bella. I admit I was a little hesitant, I even told the boy, that I wasn't sure how she would do, because she gets a little excited, but I would hold her and he could try. Dad and little sister were sitting close by, so I was praying she would be good. This little boy was great! He came up and held out his hand for Bella to smell, then petted her on the back and Bella.......just sat there and let him! Wow, who is this dog?! I didn't even have to hold her much. Then the little sister, who was about 2 or 3 came over and wanted to pet her too, I held my breath and prayed again. The big brother was adorable as he showed his little sister how to hold her hand out to Bella's nose. That's when it happened........the sweetest thing that I had ever seen! Bella put her little tongue out and licked the little girl's hand and also let her pet her for a bit. I must say, I was one proud parent at that point. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I had to breathe a sigh of thanks to the Lord for keeping her from barking at them or knocking them over because she was so excited. Boy, was that different from what I see when we're at home and people come in to see us, even when they do give her some attention, too. We went by the sweet little ones again and they both came over to pet her again, and again she was a little angel. The dad mentioned something about Bella's outfit, and the little boy told me he didn't know dogs could wear outfits...loved that! I told him that I found this one and had to get it for her. I thanked them for being so sweet and we said goodbye. I have to say, I was pretty much beaming as I got into the car. I hated to think this time might be ending soon. The first day we got home to more of the same, the same cold house, the same nightly routine. The second morning there was something a little different, as I mentioned earlier. After breakfast there were trucks that we saw on the street, they tagged some of the wires and then left. So, I realized there might be some changes at some point that day. That second day we also went back to the Chinese Restaurant before heading back home for dinner...more sweet and sour chicken and pineapple bubble tea with rainbow jelly, yummm! And this time as we headed home things were different. One of our neighbors from the street right off of our street, was walking up the street, we stopped the car to talk to her, and she told us her electricity had come back on. She wasn't sure if ours had yet, because she talked to another neighbor just a couple of houses down from us and they hadn't gotten their power yet. I pulled into the driveway with bated breath. Something looked a little different, I thought, but was it really what I thought it was? For the first time in over a week, there seemed to be light shining through the living room window. I still wasn't quite sure. So I quickly parked the car, as we walked to the door, yes, it was now confirmed, we did have our power back. I have to admit, I was a little saddened by the find. I was really going to miss the low stress life of the past week plus. We walked in to find the kitchen light and ceiling fan on. I definitely had to turn that fan off, it was already cold enough in the house. Even just having the light on seemed a little too much! Mom went right into her room to see if she could put her TV on. At first it didn't come on right away, but soon she got it and was so excited to get back to her Hallmark Channel. The first thing I did was charge my phone. It was quite a different night. I ended up sitting in the living room in the dark with a candle lit, I was going to miss that. It was back to reality, a reality, I wasn't sure I was ready to just jump back into yet. I must say even now, some nights I still sit in the living room with one candle on, just relaxing. So many great memories!
Now I know some may tease me, and some people I know already have teased me about my relationship with Bella. I know some people may think it's silly that I buy her clothes and treat her like my baby. I have had people say to me, "Stacey, it's only a dog." Well, to some people she may be just a dog, but to me she is my special darling. To me, she is a life saver. To me, she is my joy (our joy)! I also just have to share and ask, what is it that many women desire? From the time that we are young girls we desire to love and to be loved back. We desire to nurture and care, it's part of who we are. We desire to be needed in a special way. We desire to be fulfilled and proud of things we are able to do, and things and people we are able to take care of, to watch grow and develop. We desire to have something that we put our all into, whether it be our home, or our family, or possibly even our job. We desire to have a purpose. Many desire to be able to be a wife and mother. And as we think about the things that many women desire, we also have to realize there are some women who don't get to experience all of those things. But, for many women those desires are still there, but maybe we just don't have a husband or children to fulfill those desires. So we put those things into what we do have. So, yes, Bella is my baby. She has brought so much joy, youth, and laughter to this house. She has brought a purpose back to my mom. She makes me feel needed. She makes us feel so unconditionally loved. And for moments like those I experienced with her at Evergreen, she made me feel very proud. It gives me pleasure to nurture and care for her, to treat her special, and sometimes spoil her a little. I am the girl who always wanted a dog. Now I finally have one and I'm going to love on her as much as I can, so please don't think me silly. Bella has kept this household going, and I am so grateful for her! Well, that was more than I'm usually comfortable sharing. :)
Lord, it has been an amazing 9 days! There were so many wonderful memories made, so much special time I was able to spend with my two special girls. Thank you for taking care of us through all of this. Thanks for the memories. Thank you for electricity, even though I wasn't quite ready for it. Thank you for keeping all of us healthy and safe. Thank you for the joy I have to be able to take care of mom and Bella, for giving me a purpose. And even though it may not be the idea of "family" I was expecting to be taking care of at this point in my life, thank you for the privilege and for helping me to do it. I want to please you and take care of my family in a way that would honor you.